My Blog
Authentic Connections, Boundaries, and Relationships
As a people-pleaser, you may constantly prioritize others' needs above your own, often at the expense of your well-being. This pattern can lead to resentment, burnout, and strained relationships.
However, a powerful concept can help you strike a balance: loving detachment.
What is Loving Detachmen...
As you work on changing your people-pleasing habit, a lot is going to change with you and your relationships. Most of it is going to be surprisingly good, because the catastrophes you assume will happen, won’t happen. However, some of what will happen will be hard to cope with. Let’s take a look at ...
Â
When it comes to relationships, there's often a tricky balance - taking care of your needs versus being there for your partner. How much self-care is too much? At what point does it cross into selfishness that could harm the relationship?
Why Selfishness Hurts Relationships
Selfish behavior c...
Turn your overthinking into self-reflection and overcome your people-pleasing habit.
If you are a people-pleaser, one of the things you do is overthink.Â
- You think about what others think of you a lot.
- You worry whether someone is upset with you a lot.
- You ruminate on how you could have done s...
Recently, the teenage daughter of a client of mine accused her mother of holding a grudge against her grandmother (my client’s mother). My client had a difficult relationship with her mother and had, over the course of her therapy with me, set up various rules she enforced frequently because of her ...
I’ve been thinking a lot about blame recently.Â
I have a client who fights with his wife A LOT. And, neither one of them seems to be able to stop the fights.
I’ve pointed out to him that he blames her for nearly everything he’s feeling.
If she doesn’t like something he did and she tells him, he b...
Disclaimer
When you buy products or services through links on my site or in my emails, I may earn a small affiliate commission. However, I only recommend products that I would use for myself and those I care about.  All videos, articles, and statements made by me (Dr. Julie Shafer) and/or published by me anywhere online are for information and educational purposes only. Because everyone’s situation is different, please consult the appropriate professional before taking action based on information from this site or other publications by Dr. Julie Shafer. Reliance on information contained on my site, emails, or other platforms (e.g., FaceBook, YouTube, Medium, etc.) is solely at your own risk.